Why?

 I love the concept of the 5 Why's. When there is an issue or problem, we should ask why. Asking it only once won't get to the root of the issue and how best to address it. As a matter of fact, by continuing to ask why at all levels of the discussion you can solve multiple problems within the problem and get to the root as well. For example, if my kids get in a fight and I intervene to stop the quarrel, I should ask them why they are fighting. The younger may say, "He hit me!" 

Well, that is a problem! Asking the older brother why, he may say, "Because he grabbed the remote out of my hand." 

Then asking the younger brother why, he may say, "He has been on the TV for over 2 hours and it is my turn now. I told him his turn was over and he has been telling me to give him 5 more minutes for the last 20 minutes. I am tired of waiting!" 

So then I could ask the older brother holding the remote hostage why he did this. He may then say, "I have to watch this documentary on the Roman empire so I can do my homework. I am filling out this worksheet and I have to make sure to answer all of the questions. If I give him the remote I won't be able to finish this assignment before I have to leave for my rehearsal and I have to turn this in before I leave or I will get marked off for turning it in late. As soon as I get the answer to the last question I can give him the remote. I have to leave in 10 minutes so I am hoping to answer the last question before I have to leave."

At this point, the younger brother may realize that he is not taking time to understand and allow his brother to complete his homework. He may feel a sense of contrition and apologize for being so impatient and demanding. 

Then the older brother may realize that he failed to communicate his need for the TV because of his looming deadline. He would then recognize how this could be perceived as unfair to his brother who had been waiting. Being so focused on his own need and not considering how his brother is feeling would cause him to feel bad and apologize and hopefully remember in the future to show respect by communicating more clearly.

Asking why is a powerful tool!